How do you politely deal with social eating when you're allergic to everything on the menu?

I have an unfortunate allergy to all things soy. It goes far beyond just being unable to have tofu or soy sauce; I can't even eat things with soy lecithin like most chocolate , and food cooked with cooking sprays makes me ill (even the canola because they use soy as a propellant). Because of this, I've taken to avoiding eating out. Sometimes, however, social niceties demand dining out.



I was wondering how other people with similar allergies handle these situations, when you are obligated socially to go and eat. I have to confess I'm getting very tired of eating dry salads (my friends do not have high budgets and most lower-cost places don't give you the option of fresh vinegar/olive oil) to avoid having to ask the server closely about food ingredients (usually they have no clue). If its possible I call ahead to find that information out, but that can't always happen.



How do you handle avoiding foods you're allergic to politely?How do you politely deal with social eating when you're allergic to everything on the menu?
Our son has this allergy and several more. I usually just pack travel size units of things he can have. Those who know you have serious allergy issues generally understand. Some restarants may object to you bringing in your own food. But your own dressings can be discreetly brought in your purse and if you are in a group it is easy to mask.



You shouldn't have to physically handle any foods that you are allergic to. The server usually brings it and gives it to the appropriate party. Even if you are passing the plate your hands shouldn't touch the food at any time.How do you politely deal with social eating when you're allergic to everything on the menu?
I'm honest with the people I know. I have celiac's disease and am allergic to wheat and gluten. So a major portion of the menu is usually off limits to me as well. However, I don't hide it from anyone because what if I have an allergic reaction and need help? Most of the time we people with food allergies just get very sick, but anyone can have a worse reaction and your friends and family need to know what your allergies are so they can help you in an emergency.
Your problem isn't that unusual. Many people can't or won't, for a large variety of reason, eat particular foods.



If you're going to someone's home, offer to prepare something that you can eat, and make en ought so that everyone can have some.



If you're going out to eat, talk to your server as soon as possible and explain your situation. Most places will be able to accommodate your needs. If you can do so, though, call ahead to arrange something.
You said it's not always possible to call ahead, but look. It's your health we're talking about here, and it's just one of those annoying things you have to get used to. Call ahead and ask a chef about meals without those ingredients. He will know, and it's a perfectly valid question.
You can't do much other than bring your own food and offer the restraunt a big tip for the privelige! Other than that, some advice: Don't be over applologetic about your problem, and conversly don't be deffensive about it either! Many people will just think youre being neurotic, pschosomatic and angry (maybe you are a little?). It's very irritating both ways. Some eople with high allergies do seem to enjoy making a big point about it (you probably don't). Stay centred and as quiet about the problem without making a big fuss; then people are more likely to be sympathetic, understanding, and helpful.
When you go to eat, ask for the nutritional information brochure. I know that chain restaurants at least are required to have them on hand. If everything contains soy, just tell your friends you have an allergy and don't eat. I have certain dietary restrictions, so I ask for the info and I also try to go out to familiar restaurants that I know are safe. My friends and family also respect my diet, so they stick to places that will cater to my diet, which is helpful.



Anyway, try to find a place you all will like. If one person doesn't like it, then you guys aren't having fun.





Take Care!